HysteriCoach
HysteriCoach Rulebook
Table of Contents
Table of Contents
Components
- 14 Soccer Player tokens (7 red and 7 blue, numbered from 1 to 7);
- 2 Assistant Referee tokens;
- 1 Board showing the field. The board has one side printed with a green field and another with a dirt field. They're identical, but the dirt side can be used with the advanced rules you may find on the website: www.scribabs.it/hystericoach;
- 2 Ball tokens (one red and one blue);
- 1 Six-sided die;
- 25 Scheme cards;
- 18 Team cards (2 for each team) with the formations;
- 12 Player cards (6 for each team).
Setup
HysteriCoach is played by two teams. It is a game about soccer! Each team is composed of a coach and a number of players from one to six, differently from the matches on the field, where there are as many coaches as players.
At the beginning of the game, each coach determines the nation he'll lead, drawing a Team card at random. There are two Team cards for each nation: one is taken by the coach and one is given to the players. The presence of a referee isn't necessary, but if someone likes, he can be one.
Place the board depicting the field in the middle of the table. The players of the two teams will stay on the opposite sides of the field.
The goalkeeper must be placed on the square in front of the goal. On the squares of the goalkeepers is also placed a Ball token, one for each goalie: the blue ball to the blue team and the red ball to the red team. Having a ball for each team is one of the main differences between HysteriCoach and real soccer. Probably if this rule were applied in real soccer too, it'd be a nice gain for the show.
Place the 7 "soccer player" tokens in your half of the field, each in a square according to the tactic you prefer, or even randomly. The game isn't started yet!
Each player will be able to move only a determined number of tokens (depending on the number of players), and to know which ones, he draws at random the Player cards of his own team (those numbered), so that everyone knows which tokens he'll be allowed to move during the game. Hey, between the movable tokens there isn't the assistant referee, do not even try!
On a side of the board, place the deck of the Scheme cards face down, while the assistant referees are placed on the edge of the field, on the "zero" square. The assistant referees are used as scoring pawns.
Red tokens attack from top to bottom and blue tokens from bottom to top. The coach faces his players to give instructions more easily. The coach stays behind the players of the other team (see pic. 1).
Scheme Cards and Team Cards
Each coach must draw a Scheme card (if there's a referee, he'll give the Scheme cards to the coaches). The Scheme card shows the position that the players will have to assume on the field in order to shoot at the goal. On the Scheme card are shown the numbers corresponding to the players, while on the Team card are listed the names of the fielded formation. A copy of the Team card is kept by the coach and another by the players. Of course, each number of the Scheme card corresponds to a name on the Team card and, consequently, to a Soccer Player token on the field moved by one of the players.
EXAMPLE: number 3 of the Brazilian Seleçao is named Toninho Topinho. To make him move, the coach will have to call "TONINHO TOPINHO!", whose token will be moved exclusively by the player holding the Player card number 3. NOTE: the name must always be read entirely!
The Scheme card shows a yellow line. Using the OPTIONAL RULES (see page 8) it shows the sequence the coach must follow to have the tokens positioned. In the BASIC RULES, ignore it. The important thing is that, at the end of the action, the ball (following the example on the left) is owned by player 5 (it'll be the referee to verify it, or the opposite coach if there's no referee), and it'll be the player owning the "5" card to roll the die (the scheme is devised to have player number 5 shooting!).
IMPORTANT NOTE: SOME SCHEME CARDS REQUIRE ALSO A MOVEMENT OF THE GOALIE. IN SUCH A CASE THE TOKEN OF THE GOALIE CAN BE MOVED BY ANY PLAYER. IT'S OBVIOUS THAT THE TEAM WITH SUCH A SCHEME MOVES AN EXTRA TOKEN AND THUS IT IS PENALIZED, BUT IF THE COACH WANTS SO, GET ANGRY WITH HIM!
Kick-Off
After the kick-off, the coaches start to call... call? Well, cry, shout like damned, as do all coaches whose players seem cheese went mouldy... That is, the coach will have to call by name his players, one at a time of course, trying to have them positioned on the field according to the scheme he holds in hand, gesticulating as much as he wants. Does it seem a mess? Well, go figure when you play it! Let's try to explain it better.
EXAMPLE: the Brazilian coach has in his hands the Brazilian Team card and a Scheme card. According to it, he must send the player number 4 on a precise square. He looks on the Team card how is the name of the number 4 and shouts it: "Abracacao!". The player owning the Player card number 4, hearing his name, takes in hand the token number 4 (he can consult the Team card if he doesn't remember who is the number 4). At this point the coach begins to give indications: "Abracacao, Abracacao, come here, come here, on the side... not that, the other one!" and the task of the player is to understand and promptly execute the orders of the coach. The two teams are playing at the same time, so while a coach will be shouting at his Brazilians, the other will be giving instructions, for example, to his Russians!
Each coach will have to be quick, because whoever reaches the configuration depicted on the Scheme card will be allowed to try to score shooting at the goal! If you still haven't understood, go to play poker.
Summary of what the coach does:
- The coach keeps in one hand the Scheme card and in the other the Team card. (To keep the scheme in the hand is a clear enhancement compared to real soccer, in which the coach keeps the scheme in the head, where it is often confused with the shopping list and the puberty problems of his daughter.)
- The coach checks on his Scheme card the token to move.
- The coach searches on the Team card the name of the player corresponding to the number of the aforementioned token and calls it loudly.
- The coach must show with gestures and voice, holding the hands in front of his mouth as a megaphone or gesticulating, the direction where he wants the token to be moved.
HINT: IF YOU WANT TO WIN, YOU SHIRKERS, TRY TO FOLLOW THE POINTS FROM 1 TO 4 VERY QUICKLY!
Summary of what the players do:
- The players must check the name called by the coach on their Team card.
- The player holding the Player card with the number corresponding to the name called by the coach moves his token until he reaches the square desired by the coach.
Assist, Shoot... Goal!
When the coach notices that the token has reached the right square shown by the Scheme card, he cries "PASS!". The player so understands he has reached the right position and quickly moves the Ball token (only his own Ball token, don't try to be smart) from its position and puts it on the same square as the Player token just moved, to demonstrate the successful passage. The coach can now call another player and restart to give orders.
WHEN A PLAYER HOLDS MORE PLAYER CARDS, HE MUST PLAY WHENEVER THE COACH CALLS ONE OF HIS PLAYERS. THE OTHER PLAYERS MAY INCITE THE MATES, BUT WITHOUT MOVING THEIR TOKENS.
When the coach sees that the last token has reached the square shown by the Scheme card, he cries "SHOOT!". The player who was positioning that token puts the Ball token on the same square as the Player token just moved.
The game must immediately be halted and the correctness of the scheme must be verified (the opposite coach does it, or the referee if one is present). If all is right, the shoot takes place. A die is rolled by the last player who moved a Player token (see pic. 2). To score a goal, the result must be higher than the current one of that team, except that a 1 is always a failure and a 6 is always a success. For example, a team that already scored 4 goals must roll a 5 or 6 to score the fifth goal.
NOTE: BEFORE THE SHOOT CAN TAKE PLACE, IT IS NECESSARY TO VERIFY THAT THE SCHEME HAS BEEN PERFECTLY EXECUTED BY THE PLAYERS. IF THE REFEREE IS PRESENT HE'LL DO SO, OTHERWISE THE OPPOSITE COACH WILL. TO VERIFY THE SCHEME SHOULDN'T LEAD TO CONTESTATIONS, EITHER IT IS RIGHT OR IT ISN'T, BUT WE KNOW HOW SOCCER GOES...
IF ALL THE TOKENS ARE IN THE POSITION SHOWN BY THE SCHEME, PROCEED WITH THE ATTEMPT TO SCORE. OTHERWISE, IF THERE'S AN ERROR IN THE PLACEMENT OF THE TEAM, THAT TEAM WON'T BE ALLOWED TO SHOOT AND WILL HAVE TO REPLACE ITS SCHEME CARD WITH A NEW ONE, WHILE THE OPPONENTS WILL KEEP THEIR ONE.
When a goal is scored, you must cheer! The assistant referee of the scoring team is advanced by a square and both Ball tokens are placed back on the squares of their corresponding goalie. The Player tokens are left where they are. When the teams are ready, the coaches draw at the same time a new Scheme card and the match is resumed.
If after a goal the players should lose time celebrating, stripping their shirts, doing a chain (especially if female players are present), doing the airplane or mocking the opponents, thus delaying the resuming of the game, it'll be allowed (to the referee or the opposing coach) the use of the disciplinary system: that is, Spock's hold.
PIC. 2: At the end of the action, the ball must be on the token number 5, and the player holding the "5" card will have to roll the die.
Missing the Goal
If the shoot is failed, above the whistles of the supporters and the imprecations of the coach, the players will also have to restart it all, but only the team that failed to score must discard the Scheme card and draw a new one. The other team can continue (resulting quite advantaged) with the scheme it already has. In practice, it makes an awesome counterattack!
Whenever a new Scheme card is drawn, the Ball token must be moved back to the proper goalie.
Unfair Player
As it happens in every soccer match, one or more players could behave in an unsporting way, just as the coach.
If there's a referee, it'll be much easier to identify occasional infractions or incorrectness; if there's no referee, it'll be left to "good sportsmanship" the task to play loyally... just as it happens when you play between friends, going on for hours debating if there is a fault or not. In any case, if severe infractions are detected or if the incorrectness is blatant, the team will be punished with a penalty. To shoot the penalty it'll be enough to select who must roll the die, and the chosen one, between two wings of crying public, will execute immediately.
Free Kicks and Penalties
The team committing minor infractions is sanctioned with the replacement of the Scheme card, while the major infractions lead to a penalty. Don't be too stern!
Minor infractions of the coach:
- To call the NUMBER of the token;
- To call the ROLE of the token (even the goalie has a name, dude!);
- To the human player with his real name;
- To indicate a token with the hand;
- To say FORWARD, BACKWARD, LEFT, RIGHT, or similar words. In any language!
Minor infractions of the players:
- To move the token in lieu of a mate;
- To roll the die in lieu of a mate. Remember that the player who must shoot is the one owning the Player card shown in the scheme (see pic. 2).
Major infractions of the coach:
- To take advantage of the position behind the adversaries to give them slaps, kicks in the calves and shouting in their ears;
- To touch the tokens.
Major infractions of the players:
- To touch voluntarily any token besides his own.
Penalty: To score a penalty, the result must be higher than the current one of that team, except that a 1 is always a failure and a 6 is always a success.
Length of the Game and Victory
HysteriCoach can be played in two ways: "timed" or "best of...". At the beginning of the match the two teams agree on the duration (15 minutes per half time, or 10, or 5...). Some mentally unstable players will like to play a regular match with two halves of 45 minutes each. In this case it'd be useful to be sponsored by a producer of lozenges or inform the asylum.
Alternatively, you may establish that the first team to score 3 goals wins, in which case if poor (and soon exonerated) coaches are present, you may go on for hours.
Do it as you like!
Junior HysteriCoach
HysteriCoach is a game for green coaches as well, thus easily playable by kids. In fact, each Team card has a "junior" side with names easier to pronounce. Let the kids use this side. It's so possible to have "mixed" challenges between adults and kids, in which case the adult simply has to read the names on the "senior" side (do not cheat!). Come on, we understand that you coaches always want to win, but cheating with kids.
Exoneration
HysteriCoach is the only game about soccer where the coach can be exonerated during a match. If a coach shows his ineptitude to lead the team, any player of the same team (without losing too much time) can take his place. In this case the exonerated coach, between the public derision, will take the place of the player who substituted him, and the Player cards will be reshuffled and dealt anew between the members of the team... After all, any change of coach creates bewilderment between the players!
Optional Rules
If you want to hurt yourself, you can use the optional rules downloadable from the Internet (www.scribabs.it/hystericoach), but in the meantime we'll give you one: each Scheme card has a yellow line representing, in theory, the order that the coach should follow to get the token fielded, and you know this. The optional rule is to have the "theory" enforced: the coach must have the tokens fielded correctly and when he shouts "PASS!", the player puts the Ball token in the square with the Player token, as usual, but then he must also stack his Player card upon the previous one, if there's one. In such a way it'll be later possible to verify the exact order of the played cards.
And now cut the talking, the crowd is cheering... it's time to go to the field!